| i write poems about |
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| 02:15am 28/06/2004 |
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i write poems about
nothing no one
and the stares of infinite time
shaking shivering
i feel it coming on out
from every part of me
it shines
and i feel
freaked out
and beautiful |
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| 07:06pm 25/06/2004 |
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so then there are days like today. days where everything and nothing happens. you basically sit and wait for it. bam your up bam your board bam your mowing the lawn bam your board bam your at the movies bam your doing nothing bam the end,
another day of sick of being single. is it too much to ask?
ho hum. |
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| 06:58pm 25/06/2004 |
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and talking motuhs is all it amounts to
talkinging mouth keeping eyes carefully on fingers poised at the switch ready to break
at a moments notice
and playing fanciful games of chance and reason
adding up the neurons and doing long division around organelles
making this wonderful experience into a horrible game
and sides and sides and sides and sides
a cube with a multitude of shifting unsettling sides
prim and proper layers all under construction and
still rigidly forced down and all around
my multicolor chaos
is forced into multiple monochromes
and parts and pieces
how many relationships are lost |
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| 07:07pm 23/06/2004 |
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sometimes all i want to do is destroy all the beauty of this world |
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| duncan idaho melody |
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| 12:41am 23/06/2004 |
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music: that awful yeahyeahyeah song is stuck in my head; they dont generic lyric you like i do
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and dead bodies in linen closets smell too
just like fish
and just like benjarmen franklin
and a penny earned is a penny saved
but thats not true for seconds
some would ask where have we all gone
what paths have we traversed alone
that it's so hard to get past
the seconds that we've missed |
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| Time makes fools of us all. [-Phillip J Fry] |
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| 04:39pm 22/06/2004 |
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before it's been too long i find myself
catching myself
and keeping myself from continueing to stair off
and lose minutes momments hours
my eyes roming over and over
the gift
the package wrapped up so nice in
birthday anniversery easter christmas hol i day
wrapping paper
i catch all the words i would say
because they would rip apart and destroy this package
this gift
and the beatuty would be lost
there's only two thigns that can make a man
give away such beauty
love and hate
and those are really two different sides of the same axe
but we aren't chopping wood
are we
we're doing this horrible bussiness
and i feel sick to my stomach |
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| 09:51pm 21/06/2004 |
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stupid talking mouth |
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| 06:06am 20/06/2004 |
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sometimes it hurts like smoking
sometimes it hurts like dying
but in the end it cant hurt
more than living |
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| sometimes you eat the bar and sometimes the bar eats you |
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| 05:33pm 18/06/2004 |
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mood: god damn you knees music: harry potter and the something of something
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eck. sick. blah blah blah. matt's show is soon. i hope i feel better.
i did absolutely nothing today. i spelt on a couch and did my best not to move or cough.
i wana go to nYc. MONEY needed. |
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| 02:14am 14/06/2004 |
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July 20: Dillinger Escape Plan Miss Machine
Sealab 2021 Volume One
Oh God Yes. |
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| Kolhburgs Stages of Moral Development; Preconventional, Hedoistic/Impulsive Stage |
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| 12:18am 13/06/2004 |
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Well you can eat chunks of this and that and i'll still stair that wedding cake in the face like a pile of coal or fools gold; bitterness, driving like hammering nails into steel rail pounding in my head my god headache heartache you. And what; special folded notes with smiles and faces twinkle twinkle bubbly hearts and late night phone calls to hear my breathing aren't some sort of something special like thinking of roses and pedels and rice packets falling from the sky like divine bells when i held you i could hear them all the way in the back far reaches tickeling my brain steam. And it felt so good. But now our hands are broken apart like compound transverse fractures and the wine at the reception has turned to vinigar. So drink drink up from high above in that tower looking down on all the rest of us. Ms Queen, victum of fate and impulse. |
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| Dillinger Escape Plan Miss Machine |
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| 10:49pm 12/06/2004 |
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Panasonic Youth, the new dillinger single is out. again is dillinger decided they wanted to write really fast catchy songs. ryan imagine their first cd done with the musical ability of them now. furthermore the more you listen the you must and it has a riff i will call divine. |
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| 11:41pm 11/06/2004 |
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ill wear these pants
and you wear that dress
and we can have a heck of a sunday
get that new and improved smile on
american eagal kind of sensability
with baracue family saturdays
2.3 kids a wonderfully white picket fence
credit card debt
passionless sex
children with chocolate ice cream stained lips
mucus trailing down the indent of this little girls lip
and as she gets into bed with dear ol' mama and papa on a warm summer monring
all we'll think of is the stains there will be
and all this mask wearing
and second rate emotions
only from pounding ourselves into sex roles like genitals |
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| broken fingers |
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| 10:20pm 09/06/2004 |
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so holding hands in august is nice
but not nice enough
apparently
because a quick talk and no eye contact later
and it's all
tHOSE SPECIAL FEELINGS WERE FOR OTHER PLACES OTHER TIMES IN A THOUSAND YEARS WHEN THE EARTH'S TECTONIC PLATES HAVE SHIFTED AND DESTROYED MY PRECONCESIVED NOTIONS OF LOVE AND SCIENCE
SO WE PUT OUR HANDS IN OUR POCKETS AND KEPT ON WALKING. |
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| girls with pok-a-doted dresses |
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| 10:13pm 09/06/2004 |
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girls with pok-a-doted dresses should think twice more clearly before their thoughts getting ahead of their minds and they start agreeing to things they've never even thought of and making oaths to keep promises they'll never stay around long enough for their beautiful aburn eyes to grace because bitterness doesn't die of old age and a broken heart still has hands |
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| Confucius Never Covered Relationships like This Post-Modern Romance |
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| 06:47pm 09/06/2004 |
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sitting lake-side
and pondering
the ripples and patterns slowly morphing in and out of an image of you
face fades in and out of memory
from day to day
year to year
do you have an image of me
would you like to take it with you
has it whithered
and died
or do you sitting lake-side
watching the the stars and the moon
and hopping things
re-aline
again |
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| lakes like rivers connecting amoungst others |
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| 01:15am 09/06/2004 |
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so you look to that place in your soul
as if like looking into the deepest darkest
lake in the wake of a trapped forest enclosed all the fucking-round
by trees trees trees
and you stair into that water
looking for the heart in it
as if you could look long enough and it would suddenly become
lucid
a quick mapped out path
run from the lake before the attack
escape throught the trees woods
and
tumble out and about mother nature
amoung and trudging trough pricker bushes
rolling in muddy
fishing for fun
fight for and find for yourself
for yourself man |
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